Canadian Stickdeath was living the life of his dreams.

He was married to a beautiful woman and held a job that suited him wonderfully, for the majority of the work that was required for his occupation had been done years ago, and not by him but by his hard-working, competent boss, Livio.

He and his wife were the parents to a young daughter, Hannah Stickdeath, who, at age eight, showed no evil propensities whatsoever, and whose caves nobody dared to denigrate.

One day, while commuting to his job at Aeon Corporations in his car, he noticed that his wife, Flora Cossette, now Stickdeath, who sat in the passenger seat, was acting unusually grave. He asked her what was wrong.

"I have a confession to make," replied Flora. "This has been going on for so long now that it feels almost wrong to admit it, but..."

"... I am not who you think I am. For all these years you've thought I was your loving wife Flora Stickdeath. But Flora has been dead for the past 4 years. She knew how devastated you would be, so she hired me to pretend to be your wife instead. The truth is, I am actually Sir Quirvy Bam the Fourth in drag. I just can't keep the charade up any longer."

CSD grabbed his sticks of death and thought "how would she hure him if she was dead?" he decided to call the boss of aeon corp. livio de la cruz.

Livio replied by doing absolutely nothing. "Bah" said CSD, and decided to call nature.

Nature was quite amused by this reversal of roles, as it usually was nature doing the calling. Canadian asked: "Could you give me the address of life? I need to give him some lemons."
Nature found this a great joke, so he gave Canadian life's address without hesitation. Little did nature know that Canadian never actually intended to give any lemons to life...

instead, he was going to ask life were flora died, and then kidnap it to make flora come back to life

But Canadian decided that this course of action would lead to nothing, and so turned himself to a more sensible pursuit.

By now Quirvy had taken off his wig and mask. "But," cried Canadian, "you must do it! Think of my young daughter Hannah. What will she say when she discovers that her mother has been dead for all these years?"

Canadian was so distracted by the revelation that he didn't notice he was driving head-first into...

... a volcano. Even though he knew of the hazards associated with volcanoes, he kept on driving right into the crater as it erupted. However...

...Quirvy did nothing to help him, because he felt that it would be better for Canadian to be reunited with his beloved wife in death. In fact, Quirvy had already escaped from the car! So Canadian...

Opened the heat proof mats and the zero g mechanism and drove straight over the volcano

By now CSD was getting slightly annoyed. He did what any proper Canadian would do in such a situation: he mounted his trusted moose, grabbed out his hockey stick/rifle combo and went over to Quirvy to demand an apology.  

quirvy perma-banned him. he could not do anything except for constantly call livio to un-perma-ban him. so he...

...created a new account called rob garrett to harass Quirvy by posing as a homeless man from Costa Rica. He figured that he looked the part, because his clothes had been singed by the volcano, and his face was covered with soot. Quirvy, however...

Wow! The president noticed my topic!

...decided to ignore him, because he felt that a homeless dude was too pathetic to ban. But Canadian, still posting as rob garrett...

...decided to reveal his true identity; Livio's evil twin, Haily, who...

had kidnapped CSD and was hte murderer of his wife. meanwhile, CSD, in a jail cell, was...

... silently fuming, when an earthquake struck. CSD knew that earthquakes were very dangerous, decided to kill himself before the building collapsed on him. So, the moment before he was crushed...

  a whole bunch of seppukuties came and saved his life. the earthquake killed his old body, so he was stuck as rob garret

Suddenly, Canadian saw his wife rise from the crack in the earth as a ghost! He ran over to the apparition, but as soon as he touched it, he...

... died, because it was actually a demon who had come to take his soul and lead him to Hell. As the demon drove down the highway to Michigan with CSD in the backseat...

...Canadian banged on the window until it broke, and yelled out for the police. The demon...

ate cake. it then exploded, resulting in CSD flying to new zealand

burst through the window, trailing from a close distance too close for CSD's comfort. Afraid, CSD turned around and their eyes met. The demon stared him down, waiting for his move. CSD made the fatal mistake of trying to run. The demon flew up into the air and locked in on CSD. Swooping down, it gripped CSD'd throat. Though he knew he was not fully alive, he was afraid of the terror it brought. He felt its claws...

ninja'd by yimmy

In New Zealand, being the creepy dead Canadian that he is, CSD decided to stroll to Silver's house. He found out the location with some kind help by Thomas. After finding Silver, he introduced himself to her parents. Suddenly, the demon reappeared, and it...

told him he was still in rob gareets body, an that he didn't notice that silver's parents were freaking out because a homeless guy entered his houde, but this wouldn't matter, since he would be dead. the demon...

...burst through the window, trailing from a close distance too close for CSD's comfort. Afraid, CSD turned around and their eyes met. The demon stared him down, waiting for his move. CSD made the fatal mistake of trying to run. The demon flew up into the air and locked in on CSD. Swooping down, it gripped CSD'd throat. Though he knew he was not fully alive, he was afraid of the terror it brought. He felt its claws scratch his skin, and he was slowly being dragged down through the floor and to Hell, breaking the laws of physics on the way...

I didn't want your little part to go to waste Soc